On Being A Woman

Often, while giving an intuitive reading for someone a message will come through that is meant for more than just the client.  The message that came through this day was meant for every woman on the planet.  The Goddess came through and this is what she said:

Every time you say something negative about another woman you are saying that same thing about yourself.  Every time you say something negative about another woman it affects every woman on the planet.  Every negative thought about your self affects every woman every where.

This message has stayed with me for days.  It’s made me see how I nitpick at the little parts of my self that aren’t perfect in the eyes of today’s culture.  For the most part I feel beautiful.  I truly do.  But . . . I have too much cellulite on my thighs, too much fat around my belly, too much of this and not enough of that.  All these little things seem to add up and create a continual buzz just below the surface in my mind.  This constant cycle of messages tells me I’m not good enough.  When I see this out side of my mind I am horrified at the abusive messages I’m giving myself.  How can I feel beautiful and not good enough at the same time?

I realize these messages have been there my entire life and I would surmise that most women have a similar dialogue buzzing around in their minds.  Our media perpetuates these messages by continually showing us airbrushed women who look little like themselves.  This multi-billion dollar industry feeds off our low self-esteem and continues the cycle of negativity every time it takes a real woman’s body and turns it into a stick figure.  (See the latest Ann Taylor air brushed hoopla.)  It’s time to start loving ourselves, all of ourselves, the bulges, the cellulite, the wrinkles . . .

The other significant thing that happened this week is my son turned 17.   His birthday’s make me more aware of the passage of time than my own do.  I am beginning to realize that this part of my life will shortly be coming to an end.  Next fall he goes off to college far away from Minnesota.  I have worn my self-employed single parent status like a badge of honor all these years.  It has been my identity.  Look at how strong I am.  I’m doing this all on my own.

I cried yesterday.  I cried for myself and the negative thoughts that still plague me.  I cried for the woman whose identity is changing every day her son get’s closer to moving into his own life.  I cried for every woman who struggles with the passage of time and how that affects her changing body and her changing identity.

Even though there were tears of grief there were many more for gratitude.  Gratitude that this child came into my life when he did.  He saved me from myself.  He kept me sober and he kept me conscious.  He demanded that I step up to the plate when it would have been so easy to opt out.  His presence in my life made me who I am today.  He’s made me better than I knew I could be.  I also have tremendous gratitude that I have tools like Kundalini Yoga to heal the negativity of the mind.  I know that is why these “issues” are coming up now.  Sat Kriya pulls all the lower vibrational energy (like negative thinking patterns) up into the higher centers to be looked at and dealt with once and for all.

So, for every woman out there who may be struggling with these same things let’s love our selves now.  No more waiting until we lose those 10 pounds or get the right mate.  Let’s demand no less than unconditional love of self.  At the end of every Intuitive Yoga class I have everyone roll over on to their right side and hug their knees into their chest.  I have them imagine that they are embraced by the Divine Mother.  I invite them to know that they are loved by this Divine Feminine Presence exactly as they are.  We are perfect in Her eyes.  Let us become perfect in our own.


10 thoughts on “On Being A Woman

  1. AMEN SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you so much for this reminder and awareness! Thank you for framing what your son has done for you as a reminder of the gift my daughter has been to me. I have been living alone for about 6 weeks, it is a transistion like none other!

    LOVE YOU DELLA!!!!!!!


  2. Della, This made me get teary eyed and feel sad for you, but also glad that you have the ability to recognize life as it is happening and appreciate what you have. I am feeling some of those same things as my oldest is turning 16. Thank you so much for sharing.

    All my love,

  3. Dear Della,
    Your blog revealed so many parallels to what is going on for me right now it was kinda spooky. Sending you much love, peace and gratitude for sharing and you’re wonderful perspective. Thank you for sharing the Goddess message. It really resonated for me.

  4. Della, Truly authentic and heartfelt. All the women in the world thank you for sharing your wisdom, insights, and love.
    With Deep Appreciation,

  5. Darlin Della,
    Thank you for you thoughts, you touch my heart.
    No more waiting…Let us become perfect in our own”

    The word that hits me, trips me, hurts me is ENOUGH.
    I am not good enough, I may not have enough time, enough sleep, enough food, enough energy, enough patience, enough!!!!! Enough already……….

  6. Della,

    Wonderful post! I understand too well about body issues (I obsess about the same areas of my own, the belly and cellulite around thighs–I think the majority of women have cellulite). Time to start loving all of me as well! For what it’s worth, I think that you are a CUTIE with GREAT ENERGY and GREAT STYLE!

    Love, Kara:)

  7. Della-
    Finally read your blog-and oh boy it’s amazing how much of our identity is tied up with these fabulous teaching beings that came out of us! I’m trying to let go with Mad-it’s been just her and I for soooo long -it’s hard to seperate my fate and hers. Can’t believe the little bump we had a shower for all those years ago is going off to college! It seems we women have many lives in one and another is coming ’round the bend…

  8. Pingback: 2010 in review « Yogagirl2's Blog

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